twin that i met.

know this guy? i bet you do if he had added you as his friends in fb, don't worry girls, he will add you, like soon? AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. or you could just hit the 'add as friend ' button on his facebook, i'm sure you will be his friend like, in one second time? HAHAHHAHAHAHA. sorry, i knew i'm exaggerating it.

well, this guy, is just a human being that i met by accidentally. couldn't recall how we met each other at this moment. told him that i will post him at here someday, so yep. i'm actually assisting him to do the autobiography of his here. *kidding, he must be throwing his stuffs right now* AHAHHAHAHAHAHHA.

he's not my friend, he's my soulmate instead. not that i couldn't live without him, it's more of like, we have a special friendship that it couldn't be described? i will run to him whenever i have arguments with my boy, my family or whosoever. nevertheless, he's not like, reply me within a sec, he would have let me to wait for him for like more than 24hours. the moment he replies, i would have given him my grumpy face and take 'bitch, i don't need you anymore' as a reply. i knew, it's rude, but it's the way we treat each other. AHAHHAHAHAHAH

if we find out that the connection between us is getting further, one of us will make a move and warm it. * i knew he's giggling right now* memories brought me back to the scenes that we used to have a whale of time together, i mean, 5 of us, his brother and my another 2 sisters. trust me, i love to stuck at those memories as it lighten my life up.

you might not be the best, but you're good enough in treating us like your own siblings and protect us, comfort us, i might not be there for you when you need somebody to talk with, yet, we will always do our best to be there for you, but in fact, i personally think that you don't need us at all since you have lots of chicks which could be found on your facebook, AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. anyway, just wanted to say, we won't go, you won't go, as we're linked to each other, and, same goes to your brother :) i'm proud, i'm glad, to have both of you as my soul mates, cause' we don't even care about how we look, how we behave in front of each other, like dig the nostrils of us? AHAHHAHAHAHAHA.

oh, just in case, this is another human being that i met by coincidentally as well, who's the brother of the human being that i mentioned above.

he's not taken, same goes to the other ones. *giggling*

okay, i found that i laughed too much. goodnight.

don'tknowwhati'mtalkingabout.

it has been a really long time that i was out from this. just couldn't type a single word. 

sometimes, i feel like, i'm totally out from this world, totally out from the world, the world that i have been living for 20years. sometimes, i just couldn't understand, why there is someone who could afford to make you feel that you're the one to the world and at the same time, to make you feel that you're nobody to the world. *grumpy* 

there was a day, he asked me, ' why you wear a troubled face, like always? you should smile more, s-m-i-l-e, instead of showing me your sour face.' *smiling at him at that moment* ' there you go, how pretty you are, i mean it' 

i wasn't really mean to hide my smile, just that, i find it's tiring to smile at the world. i knew that we're not supposed to compare to others, my life is way better than others compared to the people out there, yes, i knew that. that's why i don't really complain about the standard of the life of mine. 

friends. i met them accidentally without any plans. it's not like we will get the return for whatever we have done. it's not like, a 'hello' will make everyone warm. somehow, a 'goodbye' is the only thing that they wanted to utter. they just left, like that, friends. 

emo, no more.

you smile, i smile :))))))))

it's for you.

i'm tired of it, i'm enough of it. you're just stepping on the same path even though you told me you're on the right path, bullshit, bullshit. you promised me, you promised me for so many times, but it ended up that i'm trying to fix my broken heart again and again. bye.

---blank---

someday, i will be there, high up there, and will not even depend on others just to get things done, you, wait and see, the decision you made, will bring you down to the lowest point of your life. 

&(%#@*^&*

i knew it's rude, yet, i just wanted to say, 

nobody dies virgin cause' in the end, life fucks us all. 

appreciate, you.

i don't need a friend who treats me like a plastic bag, i don't need a friend who needs me to keep her/him happy instead of us, i don't need a friend who i have to please her/him everyday just to maintain the friendship, i don't need a friend who couldn't take any opinions from others. 


except, you, my friend. 









of course, there are some that i have left out, yep, you, you're in :))))))))))

huh?

huh??? what did i do this time? did i call you wife of the dog? no. did i insult you? no. 
blahhhhhhhh. pengsannnnnnn.

weeheee.

love this watch, like thisssssssssssss much. nevertheless, it's not available for sale :((((((( can get it for me? 

take a looooookkkk.

the picture of the day. help me to see, cause' i'm blinded by colorsssss :D

xxx.

dear xxx,

how do you define family? well, i'm sure everyone would have defined it as a love which couldn't be replaced, unlike the love from boyfriend, or the love from friends. but the issue is, i don't really know your definition of family, indeed. you know that we're always there for you when you need us, you knew that. but there is a doubt pop out in my mind that, you seem like, using the love instead of appreciating the love.

to be frank, you really pissed me off when you left shits behind for us to handle, perhaps, you might take this as an objection. but listen, it's okay for us to sort things out for you, but we have to solve the issues as a family, not just think about you.

telling lies doesn't show you're good in using your brain, it shows how cruel you are. sorry to say that. but i'm enough with your lies, i think, you never felt guilty about this ? no ? i don't know. i, could, barely, know, who, are, you, anymore. you would have dragged others into your shits and keep thinking of making up a lie to cover another lie, i'm fatigue, don't you?

we know, we, totally, knew about these, xxx. just, we're trying to make you walk down from the stage without embarrassing you. don't you just get it? telling me what do you want to be in the future, telling me you're going to work so to give her a better life, will not determine who you're going to be in the future.
just, stop, telling, lies, can ? you're digging a hole on our heart, a deep deep hole.

xxx, i love you, just that i'm not same as others, i'm using the different way to show my love and maybe it's the reason you couldn't feel the love from me, my bad, and my apology. just pause for a while, and recall, the scars you left on us are gone, yet, the wounds will still be there forever on our heart. trust doesn't build within 1-2days or 1-2weeks, it takes for almost indefinite period of time. once you broke it, it takes another indefinite period of time, or perhaps, i'll start to build the wall against you.

xxx, i really, do hope that, you could just be more observant. you need love, and so do us. we need your love as well, don't just run to us when you're in a trouble or just abandon us when you're having joy out there. no, it's not the way we wanted, not at all. still remember how we used to play in the rain cause' we're trying to fall sick so that we could skip the class when we're still small? still remember how we used to pee at the staircases when we're still kid? still remember how we used to active in participating drawing competition and won lots of prizes? still remember how we used to sing inside the car when we're still young and made her laughed? might end this with,

The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.  

ugly world.

never, ever, trust, your, boyfriend, cause', you'll, never, knew, when, is, he, going, to, betray, you, or, perhaps, left, lots, of, shits, to, you, to, figure, it, out, by, yourself. 


i, hate, you. 

exerciseyourfinger :)

what-i-need.

i need love, yes, love from friends. 

i need a break, yes, break for breathing.

i need a shelter, yes, shelter to be hided. 

i need someone, yes, someone who i can talk to.

i need hug, yes, a big warm hug. 

goodnight. 

it's gonna be messy.

i tried, and i'm trying, and yet, seems like nobody sees it, nobody feels it, nobody cares about it, and why my life has to be injected into something which called as glumness instead of happiness, please, give me a reasonable reason. perhaps i might let you down, but what if there are hundred of thousands of people out there who let me down and i still giving them an opportunity to stand up high again. 

and you, you never cared about the consequences of bringing in shits to other's life, don't you.