Fall in love.

Just sent my cousin off to airport, felt so sorry about that didn't manage to take her to any places since she got here D: my bad, my love :)

Have gained some weights since I got back, I assume :X ah ah, not forgetting that Xmas is approaching :) have bought lots of pressies to exchange, excited enough?

Hmmmm, I'm so in love with this holidays, please allow me to enjoy this kind of joyful to infinity :)))))

so here i am.

it's an exhausting day, yet not forgetting that i'm coming home tomorrow :)  ahhh, feel so warm as i have been ignoring the fact that i didn't step into my house for almost 1 year. 

went for facial treatment with my bf and went for a quick shopping, like really quick. i don't know what's the reason of it but i'm just so in love with my bf today, ah, just today  : p   he's the cutest bf that i have ever seen, cause' he can be very nasty till i really want to give a punch on his face, and yet he can be very sweet till i can feel that i'm melting slowly, like bit by bit. 

and the thing that really makes me so ecstatic is that, i'm going to taiwan with my bf next year :) omg. really so excited. love getaway huh? :) heee. he makes my dream comes true indeed, and i'm like, REALLY? REALLY?  ahhhh, just couldn't help myself from being so highhhhh. AHHAHAHAH. gonna save lots of monies and shop till i drop in taiwan :]

not forgetting that i just finished exam 2 days ago, and it made me felt like shit, totally damn shit :(  and it made my confidence starts to wobble and beginning to doubt about the rest of the papers. urghh. is there anyone willing to teach me how to let gooooooo? nehhh, it's not that easy k.

gonna start to pack my luggage now. shall stop here. goodnight :) xoxo

It is the time.

My heart is beating so fast, yet I'm actually trying to hide the fact that I'm actually have to sit for exam tomorrow. I'm actually doing fine, nevertheless, my confidence actually starts to wobble, now, at least 20%.

I'm actually hoping that I could do without a doubt, in fact, I definitely can, rightttt?

I pray every night, and I know that, it's going to WORK. We all are, warriors. So, let's fight.

Here's the typical ones, GOOD LUCK AND ALL THE BEST. Xoxo

elo.

an very old picture of us, like very very very old -.-  just use this as a dessert for you all D: xoxo

real life

hi, i have big fat faceeeeeeeeeeee :(((( and i have to accept the fact :(((((

snap snap

i loved to be captured, yet i'm way too shy =X 

simple post

hellooooo :D 

you don't have to like me, cause' i'm not a facebook status (sounds so mean) 

okayyyyy, shall back to study time. 

take care. xoxo

quick one.

i need to be motivatedddddd, like seriouslyyyyyy. 

goodnight. xoxo

way too strange.

first time ever he's willing to self-captured with me *appreciate* :D

agree with me ?

realized that those good looking guys are no longer attractive after they have graduated from high school, it's getting either fatter or getting you know, not as hot as before. hmmmmmmmm. need to digest the reason of it D:

just a minute.

never really found a right person to talk to yet, perhaps, i only accept what i wanted to hear, what i wanted to see, simple, easy, and it makes me keep alive and moving on without wandering along the same creepy path.

goodnight.

oh time, i need.

i might not look the same like now after tomorrow, cause' i'm going to lock myself inside the room from now on. need to study like nerddddddddddd 

opppsss

somehow, i personally think my boobs look bigger here. AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. 

okayyyy laaaa, just to entertain you guys :D

shoutout

i'm so stresssssssssssssssssss :(
i need to breatheeeeeeeeeee

ice and fire.

gets ice at this moment and gets fire for the next jiffy. couldn't find any words to describe us. being together with him for almost 2 years and yet, we still fight like when zombie meets human D:  

i admitted that i'm pretty rude when someone is trying to piss me off, i would have sent him rude msg when i'm out of control. oh oh oh, he ain't go any better. he would have threw me rude words too whenever we fight. nahhh, i fight back too. 

sometimes, i would have asked myself, could i really count on you? sighhh. now, i won't ask myself this question again and again and again. cause' i can see a girl who's running out of energy to keep running and she needs to slow down, like now. and shall wait for him to lead. 

goodnight. 

HPV vaccination

hey there, have you all heard of HPV vaccination? ahhh, i'm sure you all do know about that. girls should have go ahead and injected if you love you, yourself, especially you already had sexual relationships with your boyfriend. hmm, don't get me wrong, i'm not trying to say that you all had already made love with your loved ones -.-

i will not act as a professional consultant and tell you all the details about the significant of HPV vaccination. will just leave it to you all and consult the doctor by yourself as everyone says, believe it by yourself, listen to it by yourself :) am i right ?

i'm a kind of girl who really really really afraid of injection, like seriouslyyyyyyyy. i wept whenever i got injected until i reached 18years old. now, i'm trying to pursue myself not to be afraid, it's gonna like an ant bites just because it thinks you wanted to attack it -.- okay, i'm lame, i knew it.

we asked for permission whether were we allowed to take pictures and the doctor told us that her clinic never been that liven up before as every patients came with a grumpy face. AHAHAHAHHA. she's such a great and friendly doctor anyway ;)

shall end with this photo :3

just do it.

did nothing for these 2 days and it's time to get back to the real life and work hardddddddddddddd. don't think i could afford to make the faith on myself wobbles again, not anymore. hang in there and there will always be a, sunshine. xoxo

press it.

i'm a fat girl.

hello thereeeeee, i need a boyfriend who can feed me like foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
met up with my little sister and ate like a buffalo in front of her, made me looked like a beggar D: 
and guess what? I AM HUNGRY NOW AGAINNNN.

home-sick

granny, i miss you, already  :( 
mommy, i miss you too. 

My Happiest Moment

have patience with me before allowing me to lead you guys to the topic. to be frank, i came from a very humble family that you all couldn't imagine what i have been gone through in the past of my life. yet, i was taught not to be ranted about it, instead, be thankful for everything what i have gotten and keep moving on. and yes, this is all from my lovely mother.

by this time, you all (provided you are my reader) should have known that i have two sisters - elder sister and younger sister and yes, i'm the middle ones ;) well, the relationship among us never getting faded, it keep growing up, instead. sometimes, argument might acts as a sweetener and it does work on us, like every time.

and now, we all are living apart. missing each other is a must thing in the to-do-list of ours. ahh, i recall something out of the sudden. my mother used to teach us in drawing and coloring since we were small. in order to boost our ego, we competed with each other and waited for our dear mother to declare whose masterpiece was the best. to be honest, i didn't have the chance to be the best among us, frequently. nevertheless, my mother taught me not to give up so easy and guess what, i went for lots of drawing competitions and had won lots of prizes just to impress my mother and it didn't prove futile :)

so, my answer for you will be very different compared to others if you would have asked me - what's my happiest moment.

i'm going to say that the graduation of my elder sister will be the happiest moment of mine. we all are proud of her and the tears dropped on the cheeks of ours the moment her name was read out during the ceremony. it wasn't because she had finally graduated, it was because she had won the best performance award among the hundreds of the students. at that particular jiffy, she woke me up. she had been gone through so much difficulties during those years without us being there for her. she is such a strong girl.



































this was taken on her graduation. she is such a sunny girl :) we all presented the radiant smile of us from the bottom of our heart just to show that, we all, were, really, happy, at, that, moment. so, what's the happiest moment of yours? :)

ms.pringles

hellooooo, please allow me to present you ms.pringles :333333

yessss, i do have a mustacheeeeee :-O if you do notice that. ahemmmmm. best friends would have made fun of my mustache every time we meet. yea, darn shit. that's why, i have made my decisionnnn :DDDD

BELLA, here i comeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

will start save money and get ride of my mustache :3333333333 well, nobody is perfect, so i'm trying to make it perfecttttt. blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

okay, goodnight. sweet dream.

lost faith.

my life wouldn't be better without her, like seriously. i still couldn't get used to it even though it has been approximately 2 weeks ago. 

i'm trying so hard just to meet her in my dream and it's so obvious that i'm not being given any single chance. and i have lost my faith since that day, completely lost. 

i lost my patience, very easy compared to last time cause' i realized, i couldn't compete with the time, it's so fast just like the moment the sun sets without giving me time to even snap a picture. 

hmm, staying in sunway for almost 2 years and i already started to feel like i'm no longer belongs to here. i wish to go home, so badly as i'm so afraid of losing another person who's so important to me. 

i have asked myself, do i deserve this. no, i don't right? but, why the world is being so nasty to me? :'( 

gosh, it's true

something which is true in the real life :3

without.

do you think it's time for me to put some make up on my pale faceeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ? hmmmmmmmmmm.

love-love

grandma, 


i miss you already :'((((

love.

i'm, seriously, not ready for this, and you just took her away.

she was the one who raised us up when my mother was not around. she was the one who taken care after us when we're kinda like abandoned by others. she was the one who truly sacrificed everything just for her family.

dear grandma,

hello, grandma. i seriously hope that you're doing well up there. i have to admit that i'm not a good grandchild for you. we only met up like once a year, especially during chinese new year. i'm thinking, what's the point of us to go back home since you're not around anymore? :(

grandma, do you still remember you used to make us those traditional pastries? i have to tell you that, they are the best in the world, like you're born to be a pastry chef. ah, i still remember that, all of us used to make dumplings made of glutinous rice flour served in soup together, and played with it.

grandma, do you still remember that you kept asking us to eat even though we had just eaten? like worried about that we'll starve to death. and, i do remember that we used to get the chance to have a table of delicious foods whenever there was a special date. and those foods made us ate like tigers just out of cages.

grandma, do you still remember that you used to get up earlier just to buy us breakfast? i used to be happy the moment i heard the sound coming from your motorbike, always.

grandma, do you still remember that i love to call you 'grandma' at the gate before i stepped into the house when i visited you? and you would have stood up and waved at me and gave me your radiant smile, the prettiest smile, ever.

grandma, there are lots of words for me to say, just that the space here isn't enough for me to fill up my loves for you. grandma, you used to tell us jokes and stories, you used to work so hard just to make sure that everyone is, at least, not suffering from hunger.

grandma, you're the best grandma in this world, forever. i never gotten the chance to say this in front of you,
dear grandma, i love you, forever.

rest in peace.

give your heart a break.

i might not be the best for you, i might not as lovely as you wanted me to be, i might not as sexy as other hot chicks out there, i might not as romantic as other girls out there, however, i, always, believe, that, i, deserve, more, than, thatttttt.

i don't care how worst the feeling would be, but, i think, i'm getting used to it. acting like a princess, no more. cause' i'm not a princess for him, from the beginning of our stories. i'm not sure whether am i asking too much, but, there is a little thought, always- 'no, you're not asking too much.'

learnt to be a poker face since the real world came into our chapters. cause' it isn't a big deal, at all. it's more of like, just lost one of the garments of mine, that's it.

sometimes, you'll realize, your partner might not be the right person to talk to, your siblings instead. so here's my little note for ...

dear sucy,

      sometimes, you're seriously naughty, like an evil came out of nowhere -.- yet, bluffing with you is kind of relaxing. i do know that, you'll feel depress too, it's ok, i'm always here :) always. xoxo

movies which give you heart attack.

i have to warn you before i continue to exercise my fingers here. this post will be, hmmm, slightly, disgusting D:  so, just quit if you couldn't stand :) 

i, personally think that i'm pretty unique compared to others, ok ok, everyone is unique, i know that, or perhaps, weirdo is more suitable to replace the word. i, seriously, obsess with watching movie like, 

THE WRONG TURN 

THE SAW

THE FINAL DESTINATION 

THE HILL HAVE EYES

THE SILENT HILL 

ok ok, enoughhh, my boy is stopping me from posting those disgusting movie trailer. have fun :D

advert.

almost the same.

i went to watch nasi lemak 2.0 with my boy. and guess what? the cinema hall suddenly blackout at the middle of the show. and my boy thought it's the movie effect, i was like -.-  and it really shows what the movie is trying to tell *ahem* 

well, i have been gone through lots of things in these few days and it made me so, hmmm, fuck up. i always, feel thankful for what i've gotten and only looking for something new if i'm afford to do so. dear, please be satisfied for what you're having now, it might not be the best, at least, you're better than anyone else, at somewhere of the corner. 

weather reporttttt

the weather is so damn colddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd :-/////////

short update.

hello, hello, helloooo :) just finished my progress tests and it gave me such a big relieve. ohhh, i'm getting used to the new environment here and would not want to look for another place to camp at anymore unless there is something occurs? and and, get to know a new friend who is my new housemate as well, named yvonne. such a friendly girl :)

sometimes, you would have thought of why you're doing this, why you're here, why you should do it and blah blah blah when you're doing nothing but staring at the ceiling. i always do, always. i always don't understand why couldn't i get a better one? hmmmmm *thinking*

now, i think, i have lost my faith in believing me will get through my studies. just don't know why. shall i stop or keep moving? please answer me, dear god.

tonight i wanna cry

dear mother, 


    you can fight against it, don't give up. we'll always there for you. xoxo. 

sour grape, i think.

sometimes, i, secretly, miss the one who washed the dishes with me at a place so-called, MX. the opportunity slipped through us, obviously. have to, keep, moving on. cause' i'm driving at 200km/hr now *()&^@@##(

sentimental

i'm not a romantic girl, yet, i do like romance. have argument once in a blue moon might, perhaps, considered as a sweetener in the relationship, too much might cause a disaster D:

dear love,

         though you might not be the best, at least, you could do it better. ain't stopping you from meeting up friends, ain't trying to stop you from doing anything you love, cause' i won't. there is a little selfish thought, just wanted you to stop from walking too fast, cause' it seems like, you're leaving me behind. xoxo.

without a title.

i'm not happy.
i'm not happy.
i'm not happy. 

you're good, aren't you?

song from secret garden.

hmmm, please do me a favor, hit the play button before you start to read, thankyou. 

' mommy, why they're so rich that they don't even have to worry about the meals for tomorrow, or worry about the place to stay? why it has to be so unfair to us? why they're able to shop till drops whereas all i could do is window shopping? why....' 

everyone has his/her own destiny, we just couldn't control or even ask for it, could we? to be frank, i come from a very humble family and i don't think that you would want to know about the details. i just wanted to say that, the evil thought inside my mind is growing, and i just don't understand why, or perhaps, i knew about the reason and i just wanted to run away from it. 

the moment i sat down and started to work my brain, there was a little evil inside my mind and kept asking me to get mad with it or screw it. i tried to get over it, i really tried. i tried to talk to someone who i can talk with, yet, sometimes, i chose the wrong person to talk to and it worsen my feeling, so badly. 

maybe you couldn't get what i meant, what i really wanted is a big warm hug as an advice and tell me that it's going to be okay soon after all. and please, do not get me wrong, i'm not  here to ask you all for mercy, not at all. just that, everyone gets sentimental once in a blue moon, ehhh? 

my evil thought popping out abruptly, again. i just couldn't get those words out of my mind.

' you can just sit at the kitchen and accessing to the internet la '

' i don't like the way he did '

' you better watch out, don't let me have the chance to have a car here '

helloooooooooooooo, i'm a human being and i need some love too. don't you order me like a maid, don't you treat me like a plastic bag, don't you say things to me without thinking of the consequences. yea, people are selfish, so am i, sometimes, i have to be REALLY selfish just to protect my heart. shall stop, or else, *couldn't think of the consequences also*   byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

we did funny things when we were little.

tried your mom's heels when she's not home and danced and posed in front of the mirror, i bet you did that! :3

i didn't have a watch when i were small, so i made it by myself! niceeeeeee? :3 

i couldn't sing well when i were little, yet my fan did me a favor and my sound turned out like a singer! :DDD

put your hands up if you did those stuffs when you're small, hmmmmmmmmmmmm, nostalgic indeeddddd. heeee :3

will ya ?

be thankful for what you've gotten, some other people might not have the chance that you've grabbed. so stop being selfish and show your loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeee instead of acting like a king. 

i love, i hate.

yes, i love, and i hate. sometimes, i just couldn't control myself and he made me behaved like a tiger just out of the cage and bite everyone, including him. 

life, uncertain.

a girl who drinks alcohol isn't a bad girl please D:   


jesus, please stay with me, i need a pass for my paper F7 & F8, and i'm praying from the bottom of my heart. 

pray for her.

dear baby girl,

      i knew you're a strong girl, i knew you can fight with the illness that you're facing now, i knew you're able to stand up again, i knew you don't deserve this, just, be strong ok, my heart sank the moment i knew you're sick, very sick, you just don't deserve this, you're only 5-6yrs old, you should have a happy childhood instead of taking medicine everyday. girl, just promise to yourself, you'll recover soon, don't lose to the evil, as you're the cutest angel for me in this world. xoxo pray for her.

chao taufu.

it's an exhausted day, again. headed to klang to have bak kut teh as our dinner after finished the classes, mad fatigue D:

we went to pasar malam somewhere around klang after we've finished our meal. it's probably the longest pasar malam at klang. it didn't take us long to smell something terrible after we've walked for a while. ohhhhhhhhhhh, it's chao taufuuuuuuuuuuuu ( in Cantonese )  to be frank, it was the first time i've seen chao taufu in malaysia  and it was the first time i smelled chao taufuuuu as welllll. and and, i felt like i was going to puke at that particular jiffyyy. it's like, ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

my boy made my eyes nearly popped out from its sockets the moment he said he wanted to try. i didn't stop him from trying new things obviously, i sat down and watched him eating instead -.- oh oh, ryan ended up ate one of the chao taufuuuuu also. AHAHHAHAHAHAHHA. not sure if you're reading this or not, just wanted to say thank you for being our guided tour :3

i thought my boy's breathe wasn't going to smell that bad after eaten the chao taufuuuu, then he was like, ' eh, you smell my breathe and see ' and i didn't think that much, even for a sec. abruptly, my heart stopped beating because it smelled like dog's shit, cat's shit whatever shit!  &*)^&$^%@#$(^&  i mean, his breatheeeee D: *sorry to make you couldn't swallow your foods if you're eating now*

so moral the story, chao taufuuuu really chaoooooooooooooo! :-//////////////////

off to bed now. night night :)))))) heeeeeeeeeeee xoxo

overjoy can.

as the picture shows, i'm pretty in an excellent mood recently :3  nahhh, knew you wouldn't want to know, just, take it kay? :3 

although just spent 2days of mine with my grandpa, grandma, uncle and my cousin, and of course, my beloved mom, i totally feel that, i'm the most lucky girl in this world, ever. sometimes, however, it might be hard to accept the way they live, it's more of like, i'm staying at the north with my own ways whereas they're living at the south having their own businesses.

the bond between all of us, is still there, never faded away. i'm, still, proud of my family. oh oh, it's because i have the cutest grandpa and grandma in this world. for instance, my grandpa would have doubted about my grandma if she's out for a couple hours. AHAHAHHAHAHA. i mean, don't you find they're still a lovely husband and wife? oh come on, please don't tell me that there are still lots of husband and wife could maintain their relationship as if it's the first time they met, don't lie to yourself at least. 

i'm having joys with my boy too besides having a whale of time with my family. we went to had a hair cut as well as facial treatment. nahhh, we don't enjoy this kind of *entertainment* that frequent, it's all because we're having a car, for temporary only. heeeeeee. 

i found myself drowning in the wonderland of mine, it's not like, i'm having holidays now, just that i don't have classes in these 2 days, nevertheless, i have already forgotten what i'm supposed to do, right now, yea, right now, like, revise? 

shall stop this by giving you the ELizebeth with the kid look. 

*ignore my big teeth, just for illustration purposes only* AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

what faith can do

feeling glum? feel like it's not the day of yours? why don't just take a break and press the play button :3 

-.-

yea, i'm an insane, i'm mad, cause' i'm a gemini, bye. love it or hate it.

twin that i met.

know this guy? i bet you do if he had added you as his friends in fb, don't worry girls, he will add you, like soon? AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. or you could just hit the 'add as friend ' button on his facebook, i'm sure you will be his friend like, in one second time? HAHAHHAHAHAHA. sorry, i knew i'm exaggerating it.

well, this guy, is just a human being that i met by accidentally. couldn't recall how we met each other at this moment. told him that i will post him at here someday, so yep. i'm actually assisting him to do the autobiography of his here. *kidding, he must be throwing his stuffs right now* AHAHHAHAHAHAHHA.

he's not my friend, he's my soulmate instead. not that i couldn't live without him, it's more of like, we have a special friendship that it couldn't be described? i will run to him whenever i have arguments with my boy, my family or whosoever. nevertheless, he's not like, reply me within a sec, he would have let me to wait for him for like more than 24hours. the moment he replies, i would have given him my grumpy face and take 'bitch, i don't need you anymore' as a reply. i knew, it's rude, but it's the way we treat each other. AHAHHAHAHAHAH

if we find out that the connection between us is getting further, one of us will make a move and warm it. * i knew he's giggling right now* memories brought me back to the scenes that we used to have a whale of time together, i mean, 5 of us, his brother and my another 2 sisters. trust me, i love to stuck at those memories as it lighten my life up.

you might not be the best, but you're good enough in treating us like your own siblings and protect us, comfort us, i might not be there for you when you need somebody to talk with, yet, we will always do our best to be there for you, but in fact, i personally think that you don't need us at all since you have lots of chicks which could be found on your facebook, AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. anyway, just wanted to say, we won't go, you won't go, as we're linked to each other, and, same goes to your brother :) i'm proud, i'm glad, to have both of you as my soul mates, cause' we don't even care about how we look, how we behave in front of each other, like dig the nostrils of us? AHAHHAHAHAHAHA.

oh, just in case, this is another human being that i met by coincidentally as well, who's the brother of the human being that i mentioned above.

he's not taken, same goes to the other ones. *giggling*

okay, i found that i laughed too much. goodnight.

don'tknowwhati'mtalkingabout.

it has been a really long time that i was out from this. just couldn't type a single word. 

sometimes, i feel like, i'm totally out from this world, totally out from the world, the world that i have been living for 20years. sometimes, i just couldn't understand, why there is someone who could afford to make you feel that you're the one to the world and at the same time, to make you feel that you're nobody to the world. *grumpy* 

there was a day, he asked me, ' why you wear a troubled face, like always? you should smile more, s-m-i-l-e, instead of showing me your sour face.' *smiling at him at that moment* ' there you go, how pretty you are, i mean it' 

i wasn't really mean to hide my smile, just that, i find it's tiring to smile at the world. i knew that we're not supposed to compare to others, my life is way better than others compared to the people out there, yes, i knew that. that's why i don't really complain about the standard of the life of mine. 

friends. i met them accidentally without any plans. it's not like we will get the return for whatever we have done. it's not like, a 'hello' will make everyone warm. somehow, a 'goodbye' is the only thing that they wanted to utter. they just left, like that, friends. 

emo, no more.

you smile, i smile :))))))))

it's for you.

i'm tired of it, i'm enough of it. you're just stepping on the same path even though you told me you're on the right path, bullshit, bullshit. you promised me, you promised me for so many times, but it ended up that i'm trying to fix my broken heart again and again. bye.

---blank---

someday, i will be there, high up there, and will not even depend on others just to get things done, you, wait and see, the decision you made, will bring you down to the lowest point of your life. 

&(%#@*^&*

i knew it's rude, yet, i just wanted to say, 

nobody dies virgin cause' in the end, life fucks us all. 

appreciate, you.

i don't need a friend who treats me like a plastic bag, i don't need a friend who needs me to keep her/him happy instead of us, i don't need a friend who i have to please her/him everyday just to maintain the friendship, i don't need a friend who couldn't take any opinions from others. 


except, you, my friend. 









of course, there are some that i have left out, yep, you, you're in :))))))))))

huh?

huh??? what did i do this time? did i call you wife of the dog? no. did i insult you? no. 
blahhhhhhhh. pengsannnnnnn.

weeheee.

love this watch, like thisssssssssssss much. nevertheless, it's not available for sale :((((((( can get it for me?